It’s the middle of the night and I can’t sleep. Neither can I help the tears falling off my cheek or the horrible pain in my stomach. I am scared, anxious, worried, confused, pissed off yet hopeful...
I am far away from home or yet am I not, considering my mom is just down the road in this foreign city. My mom just found out she has cancer; A T-cell lymphoma, a very rare type of cancer, maybe 1 case every two years in the U.S. Sounds pretty reassuring, huh? It has spread. It is one of the fastest spreading cancers there are. It is literally all over her body, since lymphomas are carried through the blood. There are four stages of cancer. Unfortunately, she is at stage four where it has taken over her organs. She is not well. Every minute is scary. She has no blood counts and can hardly move. It is too late for radiation. She starts C.H.O.P. chemotherapy this morning…
I am already fortunate to have a dad who has survived cancer. My dad was diagnosed with the EXACT same RARE cancer when he was 32. Talk about freaking strange. The doctors are floored and are going to start a research project, because of the obscurity of these cases. He found out at stage 1. He had 3 weeks to live. It is truly a miracle that he is alive. He beat this awful disease that was attacking his body. I am asking for another miracle. Pleading, begging, hoping…
WHY, will not stop filling my head. All the questions. I can’t seem to understand it all. It is hard. The hardest hurt I have ever felt…
Please pray. Pray for a miracle…There is always hope…
WHAT CANCER CANNOT DO
Cancer is so limited that:
It cannot cripple love
It cannot shatter hope
It cannot corrode faith
It cannot destroy peace
It cannot kill friendship
It cannot suppress memories
It cannot silence courage
It cannot invade the soul
It cannot steal eternal life
It cannot conquer the spirit
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4 comments:
WE ARE ALL PRAYING (and pleading, and wondering.....). I hear every word you wrote and feel your pain. Words can't really explain it I know. How any problem, disesase, ANYTHING can knock this strong-willed-can-make-anything-happen woman off her feet is still beyond me. We all know what strength and determination is inside her and need to keep reminding ourselves of that. The thing is, you Sarah Beth have a bit of that in you too ; )
Love you!
Love you guys!
Love your mama!!!!
Just as Amanda said, Sarah we hear your plead, are all praying, and have asked everyone we know to pray along with us. As we know, the women in this family are pretty strong-willed! Especially our Mothers! God does not say you can have only one miracle in your life. He blessed Uncle Bill with the best miracle of all, and I hope and pray he will do the same for Aunt Connie. I believe in hope and I believe in Miracles, but most important of all I feel is to show and know how it feels to be loved. Sarah, Jesse, Emily and Ben, you have deomonstrated love over and over to your mother and to everyone who is blessed with the chance to get to know the four of you!
We All Love You!
Charity
We KNOW that God's promises will never be broken. He loves each of you with an everlasting love and WILL BE your source of refuge in the storm (Deut 33:27). He has also promised to never leave you nor forsake you (Deut 31:6 & other verses). So take courage and rest in HIS everlasting arms tonight as you pray for your Mom and wife. I will see you this weekend. Love, Aunt Nancy
okay so its been a year now and I still have the question WHY??? Sarah not sure if you will ever see this but I'm so proud of you, You have had Benjamin for a year now and have done a wonderful job with him, sometimes I wish I could just get in your head more, A lot goes on in their. I love you so much just know that, I see mom in you all the time and I love that! your sister
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